Red thumb

What's the opposite of having a green thumb? Red thumb?

For Administrative Professionals' Day, the managers in my office gave the assistants and HR people cactus planters.

I know they were meaning well, and figured it would last longer than a fresh-cut bouquet.

For some people, it works:



For me, not so much:



Everyone says it's over-watered, and needs more sunlight. *News Flash* I didn't water it and it's sitting outside the door where it receives about 5 hours of Hawaiian sunshine, daily.

I can't keep a plant alive. Period.

Here's a picture of my Japanese Red Maple / Impatiens / Basil plant:



Good thing I don't make a living doing this.